Things You Should Never Do Before You Run A Marathon

1. Never drink a Grande White Mocha before you race...even if it's hours before

Especially if you are an idiot girl who has MVP and whose heartbeat is already a quarter higher than most

2. Never buy movie that you absolutely have to watch that you miss out on important things such as SLEEP

It was Mannequin. Good grief, I hope this Andrew McCarthy obsession is a fleeting thing.

3. Skip dinner

I had a crueller. Hear that? I had a crueller.

4. Not train for...six months? A month? A full fucking week?!

5. Not sleep

Why wouldn't I be surprised, with that much caffein pumping through my veins!!!

If I pass out during the race, you all know why.

(Ugh. Why can't I just SLEEP)