Finally back from the christmas party.

I will eat my words and say that I actually had a pretty good time at the party. Laarni made a pretty good party mix, despite other people not being appreciative of some of the selections. Did I mention that they were all old people?

I spent the first night shopping around, the second jumping all over the place for the x-mas party, and the wee hours of the morning with my head in the toilet bowl trying very hard to throw up the 3/4 can of San Mig Light that I drank the night before.

Was it a hangover? I don't know. If it was then i'm going to ignore it and blame it on my still numb left foot.

I am listening to the Isley Brothers. Mark burned me a chunk of his collection and working on leeching his hard drive. I haven't heard of the Isley Brothers before, but I trust Mark's musical judgement so I just gave him a bunch of CD and just burn! burn! burn!

This is the first CD. He's got some Hendrix and a bunch of others thrown in, some I know, some I don't. It should be an interesting two hours.

Clarke was interesting. I spent all of my per diem on chocolates, as per my mama's orders. I brought my nieces a cool bamboo flute and a mock bow and arrow for myself (which I left at the office). I also bought a plastic bag of sweet potatoes from an aeta kid for twenty bucks because it was the only way she made money. Not a smart shopper price, I know, but I am a sucker for things like those. I would have bought all the bows and arrows and flutes even if it only got them off selling for a few days. These people deserve a break, and it doesn't look as if they'd had one in a long time.

Anyway, I heard my niece Patti playing the flute I got her all the way from my aunt's house across the street. The people there should go nuts as soon as her sister Bianca joins here. They are musically inclined so the torture of the off-key renditions of a bamboo flute novice should be gone soon.

After I got home I ran to the mall and bought the digital camera I have been coveting. It's an Olympus Camedia 740. I got home, took a few pics, then passed out from exhaustion.

Sally and I spent the past two nights at Clarke talking about each others lives. The two of us talked until the wee hours of the morning. She has an equally--if not more--"exciting life" than me.

I say exciting in the sense that we both have great moments, and sucky moments, no in-betweens. She describes it as a "green light-red light" phenomena. We have a stop and a go, just no slowing down.

It was cathartic to finally share with someone who has an idea what it's like to be in a turbo broiler of a life and somehow not be a celebrity (who at least gets compensated through money) It's hard for those who don't go through the same thing to understand.

I always hated it when people made this comment that I had no problems, or thought that I somehow generated all this hoopla to get attention.

First off, I do not need that kind of attention nor the problems that come with it.

But even with the lows, I cannot deny the definite highs that come with it. It is during those days that I can just take in a breathe and say "I am truly blessed".

Even if our situations are different, Sally knows what it's like to go through bipolar conditions. Just knowing that someone out there has gotten this far without breaking down gives me hope.

I just found out that I took a picture of myself without my head. With my digital camera. It's a bad omen for most people. I know it's supposed to be idiot proof, but the Olympus I got is something close to a professional camera and I am still learning how to work it.

I'm going to be poor for a couple more months, along with insurance money and this digital video camera that I want to buy...hoo boy. I suppose I really do need to make some extra money if I want to put something aside.

I barely have a thousand dollars in my savings account, and even that is going to go down to barely five hundred once I make the first payment on my camera.

Mark asked me what I wanted to do with the camera, since it was just too fuck assed expensive for something to just tool around around with, and I told him that I was going to use it for this travel blog that I had been planning for such a long time.

Christine and I were supposed to make this church project, but she really didn't seem to be interested when we were planning it. I don't feel comfortable with doing the Church project myself. I feel like i'm ripping of Christine, even if it is both our ideas. Maybe i'll do it eventually, I don't know.

In the meantime, I am trying to learn working my camera. It seems to work like a regular SLR camera, which is great since I have always wanted one. Paid an arm and a leg, but I think it's worth it.

I haven't had much time to study it, since i've been lazy, but I really should get my ass off and running since my hand shakes which in turn compromises the pics. The specs won't cover for photographer ineptitude so I'll have to read the manual tomorrow and just work it! work it! work it!