Day Eight

We're almost done with my aunts nine day novena/wake.

My head is reeling from all the melodrama, and i'm not even the adult involved. This has got to be one of the nastiest business affairs I have ever been in...and I don't even care if my aunt haunts me for saying it. If she does, I'm going to have to sit her ghost down and ask her a lot of questions, and maybe even whip out a couple of documents that she oh-so-forgot to sign.

To anyone who reads this...take my advice...have a will. If you don't have a lawyer or don't want to bother with the taxes, go write it down have it notarized. Better yet, there's this site that will walk you through it for 20 darn dollars.

Oh well. Nothing brings out the best in people more than money.

Speaking of which, I have been making the rounds introducing myself as the family's next starving artist/part time enlgish teacher.

Saying that I was a filmmaker was no problem. My aunt was such a great artist that they'd half expected me to pull the next FAMAS out of my ass right then and there--but it was their enthusiasm with me being a teacher that really surprised me.

They all seemed rather proud that I chose to be a teacher--though I can't really take that much pride, since I teach Koreans how to speak english instead of imbibing fresh young minds with much needed knowledge.

I still feel like a fake teacher most of the time, and even though I enjoy it, I still don't want to have it as a career. If anything, it's the students that I'll miss.

My term closes at the end of February, which means I have some serious decisions to make come March.

I don't know why, but this is the year that I feel totally committed to what I am, who I am, and what it is that I want to do. I have a lot of things to follow through on now, and after telling everyone I have a fuck ass responsibility to live up to the expectations they all placed on me for being my aunts niece.

Not to mention the responsibility that I have placed on myself...

What fucks me is that I actually like this. The pressure. Now what does that make me?