The Art of Googling: The Rise and Fall of Blogs Everywhere

There used to be a time when the net was pretty safe.

Now, due to our own vanity and a mighty, mighty search engine, our somewhat average lives got their 15 seconds of net fame.

Don't tell me you haven't done it. I'm sure you've Googled your name. Some of you probably do on a regular basis. Googling full name first. Then first name and last. Then getting desperate you google just your last name, thinking maybe "look! that a. anderson might be me!"

(No, I never google my full name. I don't relate to my middle name so it never gets mentioned. Much like Chandler never mentions he's a Muriel.)

But all of us have been sluts at some point, and if we're not dropping our names in the blog (or other names such as KAREN Va--...nah. just kidding, Karen Va--)

OR

Using ever popular ad words in order to drive people to your site, like Joss Cola, D'Anothers, Pinoy Scripts, anything that remotely ties in to the Philippine Movie Industry, and just because I want a plug "hello to my teacher Roy Iglesias!"....

Though I'm not entirely sure he googles my name. Or even his name. Probably someone out there does. Who hopefully works for the industry, and may realize one of this Universe's possibilities: a nice note in my comment section inviting me for a job.

Of course, that never happens. Much like how the Screenwriting Guild of the Philippines never send out their union members their SGP card (which we paid for. reality is, the guy working the secretariat is pretty old. I saw the stash of ID's in his drawer, all waiting for pickup. I'm damn sure there ain't that many writers signing up, seeing as most of us are starving.)

Am I shooting myself in the foot here? Hmmm...let's try for the head.

The good and the bad of Googling is that there will always be that person who will search for the weird words, and will end up having your site or your blog strung with a host of others, who have no idea how they got lumped in that category.

Fortunately for me, the weirdest i've ever come across when I got googled is "Kriszia I am not an Ax Murderer". That wonderful webspace that had said words has forever dropped out of webcrawler botspace, and is thus no longer googable (is that a word already?) Now it's just Pickle Minded.

But that's a marked improvement, right?

Holy shit! Was that (like) a decade ago?

It always amazes me when those little things happen...You know, those little things, the ones that remind you that you're older.

And i'm not talking about that pair of jeans from high school that no longer fit you, but more like "What the fuck? Jagged Little Pill is ten years old now?"

Luke Walton--could you put him in some more, Phil?--is my age, Reality Bites has already released a ten year anniversary box set, the 80's are coming back, and teenagers not knowing what The X-Files is.

I can just see it "Yeah, that show used to be a really great hit during my day. So yeah, the remake has some pretty big shoes to fill."

The only teen show that I can somehow stomach is...One Tree Hill, and that's because I think Lucas and Sawyer should hook up because they look so....blonde together. Sort of like a teenaged version of Brad and Gwyneth, the power blondes when I was a teenager.

Let's not mention the fact that every damn day now something happens where I just have to be "responsible".

Freelance deadline job. You have to make that. Check.

Writing deadline. Must absolutely make that. Exert newly forming kung-fu discipline. Check.

Make sure cat is not wrecking the house. Even though technically, the cat now owns the house and we just live in it. Check. Check.

And a hundred other things that I suddenly have to do otherwise the world falls apart...and it's sick because if I really don't do at least one, some part of the universe might actually sag from my irresponsibility.

Wonderful how we're all connected, isn't it?

Sometimes, I still find it weird when I look in the mirror and think "wow, that's me". Because in my mind, even though I look a little bit different, I don't feel that much different than I did when I was a kid.

Yet everyone expects you to be this someone else. This...whatsthosewords...ah. A "responsible adult". There you go.

Once in a while, i'll get a glimpse of the "repsonible adult". When she's off running errands, when she cleans the house and her room without being told, when she's lecturing a teenager, when she's counseling a friend...sometimes she comes out and I get to meet her.

But most of the time, she's shy and reluctant to show herself. Probably fearful that when she's out, people will just want her to be out all the damn time and leave behind "the kid".

And the years between "responsible adult" and the "the kid" is already growing. Next thing you know, she won't remember ever knowing the other.

Now had sad is that?

SSDD? Go check the calendar again...

It's one of those difficult weeks.

When you're so busy that you have to skip on working out and taking a shower (shit), when you absolutely must find something in your room--which you were desperately re-organizing and now looks like ground zero, when the household help needs to take an emergency break, when your cat takes a shit at the wrong place and you need to clean it up at four in the morning, when you have to do a rewrite on an assignment that's due oh so soon...all of this had to happen when my hands were poised on a script that wants to get out of my brain.

And you think: why the hell does shit always happen at the same time? Why the hell does it always have to be localized in a week? Why the hell does does it even have to happen to me? Or at all?

Why, dammit! Why?!

Because it's a full moon week.

Before tearing my hair out in frustration, I took a quick peek at the calendar, which immediately confirmed my suspicions. Full moon week again, when crap seems to wash up my way along with the tides.

We are not happy.

If possible, I would hybernate for a week every damn month until the week was over. Never going out, never talking to anyone, not doing any fucking thing. Staying propped up and useless
because everything will be on fifty percent for so long as the moon is in maximum illumination.


The only upsides to this week was: a) finding the missing pieces to my old script outline, which needs to be revised anyway; b) talking to a really good friend from HS over the phone who is now based in VA...but forgetting to get her contact details so I now cannot talk to her, c) getting a fresh new idea for a script but not having the time for it until next week...when the moon is back to normal.

Damn, really.

Oh well, at least I got to watch House, MD. Last Tuesday was the Asian season premier and I am now addicted. I've always been a fan of Hugh Laurie, so even though he's shaken off his british accent for this show, I still love him. Excellent writing too.

At least I got one silver lining.

tRailers

Ever since I got DSL i've been addicted to one thing: trailers. Not because it's an accurate discription of what the movie is going to be (case in point: The Jacket) or even tell me whether or not it's going to be a good movie, because let's face it people, sometimes the damn trailer is better than the movie itself...Or the trailer is the damn movie itself.

But it's still an excellent promotional tool, and I watch it simply because I can. I get this evil grin on my face every time I log onto Video Detective watching clip upon clip, remembering the days of (woe) on dial-up.

Once you're on DSL, you can never go back. Never.

Anyway, I recently came across two clips that really piqued my interest.

One is the UK TV promo for Lost (thanks to John August for the link) who does this really cool noirish music video that tells you nothing on what the show is all about...but who the hell cares really, because at this point, everyone's heard of Lost. Even the people who don't watch it have an idea of what it is.

And thanks to this video, I am looking forward to watching the second season, this time with the addition of Michelle Rodriguez. You go, girl.

Second is the trailer to Crispin Glover's movie (thanks again to John August for the link) What is it? This is probably the most confusing and disjointed trailer that i've seen that actually gives you an accurate idea on what the movie is going to be like. And yes, after seeing, I do want to know what the hell it is and would be willing to sit for the next 120 minutes just finding out what.

Crispin Glover was the Thin Man in the Charlies Angels movies. I first saw him way back in the River's Edge when it first screened here on cable (like i'd watch it in the theaters when I was six) and his performance really stuck to me. After previewing this, it now makes me wonder what the hell was going through his head when he made this, when he wrote this...fuck, when he even got the grain of an idea that turned it into...this.

It looks like it was shot using your regular home DVD camcorder, but the effects of it all really just blows you away. And none of them seem like CGI too, just honest to goodness smoke and props. It's like the old 70's sci-fi movies with a little bit of porn thrown in. It's disgustingly and perversely amazing.

And I can't wait to see it.

Is it because it's real?

I recently read some reviews to Irreversible, the 2002 Gaspar Noe film that "shocked" several viewers from the film festivals and the theaters it was shown.

Some got nauseous, some fainter, while some demanded that they stop the screening due to the violent nature of the film. They just couldn't take it.

Honestly, I am pro-censorship...when it works. Most of the time it doesnt, but I don't think you should junk the idea all together just because the system needs improvement. And with parents taking a more active role in controlling their childrens viewing, I think we're on the right track.

What's not right is this ridiculous high horse that some people are getting onto.

Irreversible was never shown here. It probably would have caused quite a controversy, but it may have been shown with a strictly enforced NC-17 rating. Mostly because in this case, the violence in the movie was superceded by art.

Since the story centers mostly about rape and violence, and it's impact on society, you really can't cut that out and expect the film to be a success. The 11 minute rape scene and the brutal scene in the club might be hard to stomach, but it's not a reason for it to end up on the cutting room floor.

Nor is it a reason to stop screening the film.

Is it truly nauseating? I think it is. Is it really violent? You bet. Is it porn? Not on your life. The only people who can walk away from that movie turned on are the ones who have a hard hitting fetish for it.

But does it turn your stomach? Will it make you cry? It does and it probably will. You might even leave with a fear of walking down deserted underpasses at the dead of the night. This isn't your usual drama. It's a hard hitting movie that expects you to walk out disgusted and open your eyes to the depravities of the human condition.

So why this rant?

Because I don't get how some people will be able to sit through Passion of Christ and not demand it be shut down but not this. Sure, it's GOD, but it's the bias of foreign censorship rearing it's bigotted head once again.

I've seen films depicting orgies and violent shootings, most of which aren't relevant to the film but are merely decorations. Eye candy if you will. Something to stimulate a viewers senses.

So why show such an averse reaction to this one? Because it looks real? Because it was too real? Because it affected you? Because instead of turning you on, it frightened you? Because it opened you to the possibility of certain violence out there?

That doesn't make any fucking sense.

I would rather have something real presented to me with a heavy warning, than to let two people macking each other after showing violence under the guise of "entertaining and mind blowing action" with a PG-13 rating.

This is a wrong time to be prudent, especially when you have music videos with half naked girls gyrating their asses to some rappers face.

Forgive me but if you let PG-13 films that promotes violence and promiscuity into your home on a daily basis, then I can't figure out why you can't sit through a hard hitting NC-17 film designed to prevent it.

That just doesn't fucking compute.

That Sweet Working Vacation

For a lot of people (and that probably includes YOU) the term "work from home" becomes synomymous with "a working vacation".

Coming from a person who's been doing this on and off for more than a year now, I believe that i'm more than qualified to tell you that the analog is crap.

First off, I don't even really get that term "working vacation". The only way that oxymoron could have existed is if it was developed in the 50's (or 80's), where everyone trooped to "an office" to work for "eight hours" and then "went home". So any sort of "work" you invariably did while you were out of the confines of "your office" and under the sun--preferably with Martini in one hand, shaken and not stirred--falls under the category of a "working vacation".

Nowadays, it's not the same thing. With the advent of a laptops and WiFi, there's really no excuse for all that working to stop. And if you're pretty smart and have made yourself (studpidly) inexpedable to your place of work, time spent sunbathing while sipping exotic libations can be considered "billable".

But if you're just like the rest of us expendable drones, it's probably considered "overtime". Most likely "unpaid". Meaning, it's work that you would have missed and brought with you so that you could take that vacation, which you desperately need because you were going crazy "at work".

Ha. Bet that changes your mind about brining your laptop to the beach with you, huh? Did you tell your boss about the SMS function on Yahoo Messenger? In fact, did you (you fool!) even tell your boss about Yahoo Messenger?

Because if you did, he will never. let. you. go. NO.

Much as I love the convenience of being "wired" and "connected", there are some days when I most definitely do not want to be wired or connected to anybody.

And if you think that's bad, then try doing that when you work from home. Where your job and your house is all located in one place, where your daily grind starts a mere few paces from your bed.

Never looked at it that way, huh?

Sure, you can go to work dressed in your jammies or even buck naked (though it can be a bit drafty). You can take an extended lunch or even work while watching HBO (which hardly works) You can bail whenever you want and go to the mall, or sleep when you feel like taking a nap. And you never, ever have to worry about getting dressed and putting on some make-up and taking that annoying drive to work.

Those are the perks and believe me, they are wonderful perks. But like all things, there's a downside with working from home. And they are mainly:

A) You actually do have to go to WORK. Like, sitting down and doing what you would have done in the office, only this time you have more comforts, or as we call it: distractions. It takes an awful lot of discipline to not spend the day eating, watching TV, or surfing the net.

B) Errands. You still have to do them. Usually in the middle of the day, and at the most inconvenient hour. But you know what' worse? Other people's errands, and them asking you do to them. They figured that since you just sit at home, watching TV and only occasionaly do some work, you have some time to take their car to the garage or do their shopping. Basically all the things they can't do because they're at work.

C) Breaking momentum. With all the distractions going around, any sort of break will take an awful amount of dedication just to go back. Mostly because these breaks tend to be fun, like a really nice BW movie on Replay at Cinema one, which you absolutely have to watch because studying the language and cinematography is monumental to furthering your writing career.

D) Three letters: ADD. It's not a good idea to have this when you work from home, but if you're like me and your home job rakes in a hecka lot more than a regular office job, your just going to have to suck it up and wear blinders to your computer.

E) Longer hours. Not only do you feel like the hours extend to forever, but working from home often forces you to work more hours. Why? Because you get paid more. Work from home jobs are usually paid by the hour, unless it's a packaged assignment. In which case, you try and finish the job as soon as you can so you can ask for another assignment. Thus, alloting it more hours.

F) Paid vacations. We don't have any. Since we are contracted, we only get paid for the hours we work. So no special benefits like pension funds or health and group insurance. You pay your own benefits, go out of the house and to the government agency to pay for said benefits, and yea, you (cringe) take the trouble of computing for your own monthly income tax.

G) Paying for your own equipment. Unless it's in your contract, you probably will end up paying for your own equipment and utilities. And sweetie, that electricity bill sure jacks up if you've got that PC on 24/7.

H) It gets lonely. Humans are a social creatures (and yes, that still includes me) At some point, you do miss just turning around and having an officemate to talk to while working. You can turn on the television, but you'll probably end up watching it. You can make a phonecall, but the desperation will probably make it last a few hours. Besides, who can you call? Everyone's at work.

In the end, working from home is great, but it may not work for everyone. If your social and love going out, staying home is probably not a good idea, especially if your only reason is to avoid rush hour commutes (after all, what else would it be, hmm?)

It works for me because as a (struggling) screenwriter, I need the flexible hours. I don't make my living writing scripts yet, so I spend most of my days in my paying writing job, while using the free hours to polish my script or do some networking or research. So if you look at it, I pretty much work all the time.

It also helps that quite a bit of my friends work odd hours or work from home too. So most of the time it just requires clearing a day and making up for it tomorrow or next week, or meeting them early in the day before they go to work. It doesn't take as much planning as it would if all my friends and were in a regular nine to five schedule.

Bottomline is, think very hard before you quit your nine-to-five for a work from home job. It may not be what it's cut out to be.

Better yet, stop telling me that I got the better end of the stick because I work in my jammies (which, for the record, I no longer do) and get to sleep until noon (which I can no longer afford to do either). Let's have you sitting in my chair when the ceiling feels like it's closing in and you start talking to the walls.

Now if you'll excuse me, the plaster has spoken. It says I need to go out to the mall and go see that movie.

Crawling Towards Salvation

Yesterday I took the two boys out to watch "D'Anothers", one of the few pinoy movies who legally ripped off from other movies.

In short, this was one our first Pinoy spoofs.

I saw the trailer and seeing as I will be working in this industry, I went in to watch--dragging a protesting Mark and JP.

Mark is pretty open minded but JP made this credo that he would never watch a pinoy film (ahem) ever. Ever? Yeah, ever.

But since he has me for a friend now, he has no--or rather, he HAD no choice--but to follow me in.

Granted, it wasn't a 10, but it was a 7 and it was awesome simply because it was not only passable, it was GOOD.

We already know that Vhong Navarro has great comedic timing, but Tony Gonzaga was a steal. I don't watch Wazzup, Wazzup, so I may be a bit delayed in knowing something that everyone has already seen, but damn that girl's funny.

Of course, most of the jokes were still pretty much slapstick. And there were some supposedly funny scenes which didn't really sell, along with the requisite "dance-off" that was supposed to be entertaining and hilarious but didn't really deliver.

But barring all that, this was hands down really hot damn funny. I might buy a copy of it just to see if the jokes would sell again, but if you haven't seen it, I suggest you do.

The Philippine Showbiz industry might have been on a downslide, but I say we're back in business baby and we are on the way up again.